Be cautious about what you say

Have you ever said something to someone that came back to haunt you later? One thing that has stuck in my mind that I said years ago to a grieving friend who had lost a sibling: "I know exactly how you feel". I had lost my own brother a couple of years before that so I may have had some idea how that person felt. But now I realize that no one can understand exactly how another person is feeling. I've been pretty open about Tom and I's journey with his cancer. I've written about it online, I've answered questions from people, and just generally been an open book. This has opened me up to hearing some pretty thoughtless comments from people that either hurt my feelings or make me angry. I constantly have to remind myself that people just don't know what to say in these situations and are truly just trying to help. I wish I could tell you what the "Right thing" to say to people is; it would make all our lives so much easier. I can say this-think carefully about what you say before you say it. Sometimes if you're not sure what to say, the best thing to say is "I'm here.", "I'm praying", "I love you". Just be there for them. Let them know you're thinking about them. Let them know you're praying for them. Offer to do something to help-like bringing a meal or picking up medicine. Your presence and love means so much to those of us going through a tough time. More than anything, we just  need to know people care.